Parenthood, Snowboards, and New Age Mind Fucks.

Segment One: PARENTHOOD

You never know what kind of a parent you will be until you are one. And even then, your kids are constantly changing, in turn, making you realize (rather humbly at times), that you don't know SHIT about parenting and thus changing the "type" of parent you are again.
I am also the type of person who has a lot of opinions (hence the blog...), and so with my first pregnancy I had a LOT to say about how I was going to raise my baby, and what I was and wasn't going to do. Buuuuut, as any other parent knows, you can throw all those opinions out the window once your baby shows up.
What I can tell you is that I didn't think I would be so 'mushy' about motherhood as I am. I didn't think that my hard-nosed disciplinarian ways would be worn down quite so damn quickly (my kid is only 2 for Pete's sake!). And I didn't think I would've been able to give up control and just let things be as much as I do.

Examples:

1. Mushy Mother:  Operation Big-Boy Bed has been in full effect for one full week. The first few days were pretty good. Apollo would call me each night to come to his room (the first night it was FOUR times, and then every night thereafter was less and less.) But it seemed that he understood that he was a big boy now and could no longer sleep in mommy and daddy's bed now that he had a nice big bed of his own. And then the last couple of days, everything went to shit. Why, you ask? Hell if I know. All I do know is, that last night he tried to come into our bed in the middle of the night, so Kevin walked him back to his room and of course he started crying. The crying was not 'tantrum-y' anger crying, but full on devastation, river of tears crying. And he was yelling "Mummmmmmmy! Maaammmmaa! Mum! Muuuuuum!". So I went over there... I had to! My poor heart couldn't take it! And he starts patting the pillow beside his little round head saying, in between sobs, "Cozy Mama. Cozy." I felt sooooooooooooo bad telling him that I couldn't because I had my own bed, blah blah blah. I tucked him in nicely and bent in for a kiss. He then wrapped his chubby little arm so tightly around my neck and pulled me in super tight for a hug and wouldn't let me go. This is when my tears started rolling. I felt sooooooooooooooooooooo sad for him! My poor boy just wanted to snuggle with his Mom, and for the sake of "it-will-make-it-better-in-the-long-run", I had to turn him down. After the hug, he asked me for his flashlight, and I tucked him in and said Goodnight. He fell asleep right away. I on the other hand, did not. I sobbed quietly in my bed for the next hour. In the morning I crawled in next to him in his bed to snuggle. See? Pure Mush!!

2. Discipline=Over: My kid used to go to bed at 7:30pm on the dot. Then it was 8:30pm. Now its, anywhere between 8 and friggin midnight! I used to think I was pretty darn smart at having 'mastered' a regimented bedtime. Yeah, I've flushed my smartie pants smugness right down the toilet.

3. Letting go of Control: When I was pregnant I read an awesome book about raising your children Diaper Free (meaning, starting potty training from birth pretty much) and I vowed I would have my son out of diapers by a year and a half. My mom says she did it with my sister and I, and a lot of Europeans are able to train their children early. Now that Apollo is at the age where we could do a hardcore potty training routine, I see that it is way more up to the child than I initially thought. And now, I am just letting go of the idea that I am a crap parent because my kid still uses diapers, and that his time will come. As my one friend says, "No man walked down the aisle at his wedding wearing a diaper." (In theory, anyway...)


Segment Two: SNOWBOARDS

For those that don't know, I live in Canada. I live in a northerly city in Canada. One that has cold, and usually long winters. Most people hate it, and complain ALL winter long about how much. Every day. Year after year. I used to be more of a complainer, so about 8 years ago or so, some girlfriends and I decided that we would take up snowboarding to give us something to look forward to in the winter. We didn't take any lessons--we taught ourselves, which believe me, a lesson or two would have cut down on a lot of ass-meets-ice time. For anyone who snowboards, I can tell you the obvious: I fell in love with it! It's so much fun! And I LOVE being in the mountains! It is such an amazing feeling knowing that you are ON A MOUNTAIN! The peacefulness and serenity and pure beauty of nature is awe-inspiring up there--it's like God is talking to you. And not to mention, the pure fun, adrenaline rush of carving through the snow, going fast with bits of snow flying at you, and breathing in the cool fresh air.... SO fun! Well, needless to say, with becoming a mother in the last couple of years, and about to pop out another baby in TWO WEEKS (yikes!), I can tell you that I haven't been much in the last few years. And that is probably precisely why I am craving it sooooo massive! The other day I was wearing my Viva Burton sweatshirt - A. because it's warm, B. more importantly, it fits - and it inspired me to do some online browsing at some cool stuff...

Check out these FRESH bindings by TokiDoki for Ride:

http://www.tokidoki.it/

And some super cool decks I found on Burton's website:

http://www.burton.com/

And of course, some wicked videos to live vicariously through: *sigh*

(this video looks like the boarder is being 'pulled' by something, like a snowmoblie etc., but he's not... he's actually holding onto a camera mounted on a stick. Go to http://www.gopro.com/ for details...)

Segment Three: NEW AGE MIND FUCK.

My hubby was just watching the movie "What the Bleep do we know." until he passed out about a half hour ago and I stopped to listen to something that BLEW my MIND!

For any of you who have watched "The Secret" or any kind of 'manifesting' type show or read any books on those subjects, this movie is one of those. They were saying how the mind only sees and accepts things it 'knows' or believes are real (that is why we keep on attracting the same type of realities to us--the same type of shit jobs, the same type of shit boyfriends, etc). Anyway, they were saying that as legend has it, when Christopher Columbus' boats showed up, the natives didn't see them. The boats were right there on the water, but the natives could not see them. They had never seen any before, nor did they know that boats existed, so their minds did not believe in them, therefore they could not see them with their eyes! The Shaman Preist dude of the tribe noticed ripples in the water that the boats were causing, and eventually after studying this for days, (because he knew there had to be something causing the ripples) he was able to see the ships. And because he was a trusted member of the tribe, and his tribesmen believed in what he said, when he told them they of course believed him and then were able to see the ships. Isn't that a COMPLETE mind fuck?????? That means that there is soooooooooooooo much out there that we probably don't physically SEE because we don't believe in it! There are probably a bajillion Aliens and fucking UFO space ships parked all around us, but because we've never seen them before our brains and eyes don't accept them therefore causing us not to see them! That's only one example, but if you really think about that concept, its really mind blowing.

Well, I will leave you with that little doozie to ponder while you hit the hay, and other wise I want to warn you that if I don't fit in another blog post in the next 2 weeks, you may be waiting a while.... I am due to give birth on November 22... so my life is gonna get a little mushier, and lot more out of control and hectic after that I'm sure!

Buuuuuuut, as always, I will try my best! Goodnight friends! xoxoxoxoxo